In the 4th part of this 6 part series, I am going to discuss how to overcome the inevitable obstacles that will get in your way. We previously discussed how to set your goal, then how to create your milestones. The last post in the series covered how to accomplish your milestones. All those posts are the main bulk of the information. Know what you want – make a plan – go get what you want. But there are still little things that get in the way. This post is how to keep pushing through until you accomplish it.
Let’s face it: If you had a 100% success rate getting from point A to point B without ever losing your way or falling off track, you probably wouldn’t be reading this. Since you are taking the time to read this, you probably need help getting on the right track. And I am here to help. If you think that you will make your goal, go along your path and “Just Do It” to success without any hiccups, that is great. You have the right mindset to be successful. However, that is probably not the case. There are things that come along that try to push you off the path. Holidays are a great example. People who try to lose weight get so freaked out around the holidays because there is turkey, and bread, and stuffing, and pie, and candy, and fruitcake, and whatever other treat is out there.
Do you know what the most typical length of time someone holds on to their new years resolution is? According to ProactiveChange.com, 75% will hold their resolution past the first week, 71% past 2 weeks, 64% after 1 month and only 46% will hold it long that 6 months. I hate to say it, but the odds are actually against you. People expect you to “fail”. How does that feel? Defeated? Worthless? Why Bother?
Well, show ’em they are wrong. Most people do not succeed because they already think they are going to fail. They already have all these thoughts of not succeeding last year, and all the things that will get in the way, and all the doubt the comes along with “can I actually do this?”. You CAN do this. Don’t let all those thoughts get into your mind. If you want it bad enough, which I assume you do being that you are reading part 4 of this series, you can do it.
Another reason why people “fail” is they think that if they fall of the wagon one time, they are done. No way to catch back up. They quit. Quitting is the only way to fail. I don’t believe in failing – unless you quit. I also don’t believe in quitting, no matter what the scenario is. Quitting = failing in my book. If you quit, then yes, you did fail. Pat yourself on the back and get ready to do the same thing next year. If you want to succeed, do not ever quit. NEVER EVER EVER. I don’t care how many cheat weekends you have, or how many times you binge and breakdown and completely run the other way down your path. Quitting won’t get you to the other side. Getting up, brushing yourself off, creating a mental inventory of what happen and how you can prevent it in the future, then running right back down the narrow path is the only way you will succeed. Instill in your mind that there is no such thing as failures. There are only results. Missing 5 consecutive gym days is a result of being lazy. Binge eating on that weekend with the boys is a result of no control. Going on a shopping spree when you really didn’t need it is a result of impulse. They aren’t failures. They are all results. Adjust the results.
How To Adjust Results
Most of the time, people are well aware when they cheat from what they are suppose to do. They actually know before, during and after. Anyone who says “I didn’t know what I was doing” is wrong. It was a weak moment. Everyone has them. That moment that your conscious gets the best of you and you fall into temptation. Although the best way to success is to stay on your path to the end, it is nearly inevitable that something will happen and you will fall off the wagon. When it does, don’t be too hard on yourself. But be somewhat hard on yourself. If you binge and fall off the narrow path and aren’t difficult with yourself, you are very likely to do it again because there is no punishment for yourself (keep in mind that pain/pleasure hold we have on ourselves from the last post). But don’t get so down on yourself you lose sight of the big picture. It is honestly not the end of the world. You can come back. Here is what you need to do when you fall into a moment of weakness:
- Admit to yourself you cheated. Don’t try to justify it. Don’t tell yourself it is OK because you are too tired, or you were depressed, be honest with yourself and you will get results. Know you did wrong, accept it, learn from it, and move on.
- What went wrong? Why was it bad? You are not looking for the justification on why you did it, but look for the habit. Was it a certain food? Was it a certain time of day? Was it a certain store? Was it a certain….find out what went wrong. Knowing the habit/incident that happen is a very powerful way to tell your brain “ok, I did this, it was bad and I will try to not to do it again”.
- Adjust the result. This is the biggest thing you can do to fix what happen – adjust the result. The result clearly isn’t what you wanted, so readjust your thinking and get back on track. Most people do not succeed because they fail to adjust (they quit). Don’t let one bad day (or a million bad days!) effect your determination to accomplish your goal.
- Keep moving forward. Put the falter behind you and keep walking straight. Be aware of what happen so you don’t dip again, but keep pressing on, following your path and milestones to accomplish your goal.
Set backs will happen. It is how you handle the set backs that will determine your success. Some falter off the path then quit. Prove to the world that you will not be like everyone else. You will set your mind to something and succeed. You can do this if you try and keep going. If you quit, you will never do it.
So the take away: Look long term. Yes, you will have hiccups along the way. The journey is long and hard, but you will get there. You will never get there if you stop trying to get there. I leave you with a video from a Rocky movie. It has a great message about getting hit, and keep on going. The quote from this clip is underneath and fully worth reading itself to get the message.
“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place.. and I don´t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently, if you let it. You, me or nobody, is gonna hit as hard as life. But ain’t about how hard you hit… It’s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward… how much you can take, and keep moving forward. That´s how winning is done. Now, if you know what you worth, go out and get what you worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits. And not pointing fingers saying: You ain´t what you wanna be because of him or her or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain´t you! You´re better than that!” (Rocky Balboa)